At FHC, we work with a lot of business owners who are dissatisfied with their website's performance. They might receive plenty of traffic to their site, but visits don't convert to enquiries or sales. It's our job to work out why and make the necessary improvements. Here, we share our insights into the most common sales page copy mistakes and how to fix them.
1. You don't know who you're talking to
When a person clicks through to your website sales page from Google Search, a social ad or anywhere else, they have already done a lot of research and have decided to purchase a specific product or service. When they land on your sales page, your job is to convince them to buy from you. So you can cut to the chase. But many websites don't. Their sales pages contain reams of unnecessary information pitched at the early stages of awareness. This wastes time and loses the buyer's attention.
Eugene Schwartz’s 5 Stages of Awareness
What's the fix?
Your sales page should speak specifically to a buyer who is at stage 4 or 5 of awareness. It should clearly present your value proposition, unique selling point (USP), and product or service details. Back these things up with strategically placed testimonials and links to case studies that evidence the value you have delivered to past customers. Also, include a FAQ section that answers those questions and objections that can prevent a sale.
In the example below, Adobe quickly sets out its value proposition and USP in just a few sentences at the top of the page.
Example of effective sales page copy
2. You have a wall of text
Large paragraphs of text can overwhelm (or bore!) the online reader and affect how they process the information that you need them to absorb.
What's the fix?
The ideal paragraph length for websites is 2-4 sentences or five lines of text. Remember that five lines on a desktop will look like a large block of words on mobile, so strike a balance. Use headings, subheads, bullet points and other visuals to break text into easily digestible blocks of information. And don't forget the golden rule of one subtopic per paragraph.
The example below from Udemy breaks text up further by having three clickable tabs of information. Green Flag uses a simple but effective combination of titles, subheads, bullets, colour and plenty of space with an unmissable call to action.
Using headings, subheads and visuals to break up text
3. You don't have a clear call to action
The online reader has been conditioned to be told what to do next with a call to action (CTA) button or clickable text link. If you don't provide a clear path to purchase, it can cause irritation and frustration, negatively influencing the purchase decision.
What's the fix?
Invite the reader to take your desired action with consistent and strategically placed call-to-action buttons. Common CTAs include 'Buy Now', 'Request a Demo' and 'Contact Us'.
4. Your page layout or design is off-putting
The best copy in the world can be a flop if the visual elements of your page let it down.
Common mistakes include:
Fonts that are difficult to read or too small to read comfortably
No natural visual flow to the content
Not enough 'white space' – the space around the content and elements on a web page
Blocks of centred text (left-aligned is much easier to read)
Images or design elements that detract from the main message.
What's the fix?
Follow web design best practices, including those described below.
Simplicity
Less is always more when it comes to web design. The visual elements of your site should complement and enhance the written message, not detract from it.
Colours
Use a maximum of five colours that represent your brand.
Typefaces
Choose a highly legible typeface and a text colour that contrasts with the background colour to aid readability. Use a maximum of three different typefaces in a maximum of three different sizes.
Graphics
Make sure that graphics exist to aid understanding and enhance your message, not conflict with it or distract from it.
Visual hierarchy
Organise web elements to draw the reader to the most important information first, then lead them to your call to action.
Continuity
Be consistent with your site's overall look and feel. If you have multiple service pages, use the same layout for each page to provide a consistent user experience. Bupa does this well in the example below.
Example of consistency between sales pages
5. You're fumbling over features
One common mistake many businesses make is solely focusing on product or service features in their web copywriting. While it's essential to highlight what you offer, it's equally crucial to emphasise the benefits customers will derive from using your offerings.
What's the fix?
Highlight the transformation or solution your product/service provides – this will address the pain points your audience faces and demonstrate how you can alleviate them. By showcasing tangible benefits, you can effectively persuade prospects to take action.
In the example below (left-hand image), Hive gives the technical features of its product context and relevance to the buyer. Hive could further improve this section of its website (right-hand image) by:
i) including some visual icons with each feature
ii) using bold text to separate each feature from its benefit(s).
Explain the benefits of features
6. You're being brand-centric
Your sales pages should be about your buyer, not your company, yet many brands still use "We" messaging in their sales copy. Nobody wants to listen to a monologue at a party; the same goes for your website.
What's the fix?
Switch to "You" phrasing. It engages the reader in a conversation which invites them to:
i) Take ownership of the problem that brought them to your website
ii) Reach for a solution (your product or service).
In fact, there is only one place for "We" on your website – "We promise". An authentic statement of commitment will build deeper trust and connection than any statement of qualifications or certifications.
Summary
Your website sales pages needs to work hard for you. Give them a chance to shine with copy that:
Speaks to the right audience
Is easy and enjoyable to read
Invites a specific action
Looks organised and on-brand
Explains features and their benefits
Puts the reader centre-stage.
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Take control of your web page copy
Contact us for an assessment of your website's conversion optimisation opportunities.
